Hello friend. What a week. Oh damn what a week. Remember it is ok to not be ok. Something I’ve been seeing a lot is people sending hugs. The gesture is appreciated in “these unusual times” but not everyone is good with a hug. There’s the complexity of etiquette. How long do you hug before it becomes weird? Where do you put your arms? Do you rub? Squeeze? Make sounds? On top of all that some people have sensory issues and they don’t like to be touched. So your gesture of support can actually be upsetting to others.
I have grown to tolerate hugs but I’d prefer a thoughtful head nod or cash. Still, it got me thinking about the amount of times I see hugs on Discord, Twitch, Twitter, etc. The thought is appreciated but the contact isn’t. So I now say “contactless gesture of emotional support”. Catch eh? CGES. Yeah that needs work.
To quote Jen on Facebook;
Remember, as you continue in dialogue and solidarity with the black Neurodivergent community, true advocates and allies please take note: To be Pro Neurodiversity is to be Anti Racist. We’ve had this conversation before: For The Black NeuroFam the target of inequity is bigger. 50% of people killed as a result of unjust policing are people with disabilities. To be Black and Autistic is to be a direct target in America today.
We’re not always safe, understood and accepted by many. This fist integrated with the Neurodiversity symbol is the first step of an anti racist artistadvocateally collective I’m building to amplify BIPOC. I am half Puertorrican so Latinx, Caribbean voices must be included.
If you would like to read more about Black Disabled Lives Matter there is a Substack post discussing it.
How do you stop beating yourself up, hating yourself and simply wanting to die? How do you recover from that and be “normal” again? I have never figured out how to come back quickly. It takes days of me waiting it out and it eventually passes. I can’t throw myself into my work. Photography hasn’t beaten this. My troubles don’t drift away when I’m behind the camera. They’re right there with me telling me to do something stupid and have done with it. I’ve learnt to cope but not to quickly recover.
I wish I had all the answers for you. I only have suggestions.
- Free Guide To Living With Worry And Anxiety Amidst Global Uncertainty - Psychology Tools
- via LGBT Foundation on Twitter - “Depression and low mood” - A guide for LGBT people
- A book I found helpful a few years ago is Lost Connections by Johann Hari. I need to re-read it.
- Tips for coping with depression - NHS
A friend suggested making a list of things you enjoy and doing them when you’re not doing well. They may not have an immediate effect but you’ll be better of trying than sitting there letting depression eat you alive.
Something I have found that sort of helps is to write. If you have no-one to talk to then write in a diary, a notepad, a plain text file etc. Just sit down and pour your heart out onto the page. When you’re done either save it for your future self to look back on or delete it. I’m finding that writing is really helping me to make sense of thoughts in my head.
When I was first diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) a friend suggested I watch the video series “Ask an Autistic” on Youtube. It was a big help and opened my eyes on a lot of topics. How to word things, why certain things happen, how to cope and so on. If you enjoy the above video go check out her work.
The Mersey Ferry, 2017. These photos could have been taken today to show social distancing on public transport.
- Opinion | The Curfew Is Over. New York City’s Fight Is Not. - The New York Times
- Instagram says sites need photographers’ permission to embed posts - The Verge
- The Photographer’s Guide to Inclusive Photography
- Resources on Anti-Racism Work - Authority Collective - Google Docs
- So Far… | Phil Kneen
- Capturing the cry for change: photographers on the BLM protests | Media | The Guardian
This week I’m looking at photography in video games from GTA 5 to Star Wars: Jedi Fallen Order. Things have come a long way in 20 years.
I got some new polish from Barry M this week. Dragonfish and Crystal Blue. I tried it with and without a black underlay just to see the difference. It’s quite interesting seeing how a black base layer affects the colour. The middle two fingers have the black base. It brings out the green in the sparkly blue polish and helps deepen the purple one. I think I’m a fan of the last two nails though. The darker purple and the nice blue more than the others. I need to start logging combinations as I have a lot of nail varnish now.
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- Chronic illness has made me a self isolation expert: here’s how to ease yourself out of lockdown | Life and style | The Guardian
- Our skin in the slave trade. Uncle Sir John Moore and I. — duckrabbit
- How to be an ally to Trans people via LGBT Foundation
Just when you think things couldn’t get any worse your Sims are peeing fire.